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My best friend was a professional psychic. She made her living at it—and she was good. But by the time I became friends with her she had given up the profession that she was so skilled at.

This was bad timing for me. I loved psychics. From my very first encounter in 1992, when a 90-year-old soothsayer told me I’d be doing the work I currently do, I was hooked.

Back then I wanted seers to tell me my life was going to turn out okay—that I would become rich, happy, loved, and successful.

But my friend gave up being a professional psychic for that very reason. People came to her to give them good news, although they were the creators of their life all along. “All I can read,” she told me, “is what the most likely manifestation will be. And any person can change that at will—so I didn’t think I was helping by insinuating that their future was on a fixed course.”

It took me a while to see it, but my friend gave me something far more valuable than a predictive reading. She taught me how to trust my inner knowing.

Whenever we talked about anything—from the most esoteric conversations to the most mundane—she would ask me: “What do you get?”

I remember the first time she posed that question. We were talking about the possible reasons I was having difficulties creating money. Suddenly she turned to me and asked, “What do you get?”

I was shocked. “I’m not a psychic,” I thought. “Why is she asking me?”

And then I thought a bit more about it, “Why not? Maybe I do ‘get’ things like she does.” And I felt inside—and I had an insight: “It’s safer for me to be a victim than to be successful.”

“Wow! I do ‘get’ things,” I thought.

My friend gave me a beautiful gift that day, and many days thereafter—a gift that has grown into a solid and trustworthy connection with my wise inner self. Trusting my inner knowing has made a huge difference in my life.

It has helped me know when my (conscious) creations are manifesting and just need more time, or when they are stalled and need belief work in order to move forward.

It has helped me know when to flow more energy (via techniques) and when to sit back and allow my magic to work.

And it has guided me through all of the major (and many minor) decisions of my life.

My knowing wasn’t always accurate—wait, let me rephrase that. I didn’t always listen accurately to my inner knowing. But eventually I learned to listen accurately. Trusting my inner knowing has developed, over time. And you can develop yours too.

Some tips to help you develop trust in your inner knowing

1. Know you have it
That still, small voice is inside every one of us. It is our connection to the “more” of who we are. You can call it intuition, inner wisdom or your higher self. But it will lie dormant inside of you until you…

2. Give it time and space to speak
Your inner knowing isn’t going to tap you on the shoulder and insist you listen to it. You have to make the time and a quiet space for it to be heard. How?

It doesn’t matter—as long as you quiet your mind. You could take long walks in nature (alone). You could take luxurious baths or do yoga. You could meditate. You could simply stare out the window with a cup of tea.

The most important thing is that you make the time regularly. But in order to know if you’re listening to your wise, inner self, you must also…

3. Give your “negative self” equal time and space to speak
Every inner voice isn’t always your “wise self” speaking. There’s a part of you that wants to sabotage you, to keep you small and that undermines your dreams and growth. I call that part the “negative self” and it’s just as important to let that part of you speak.

Even five minutes a day of letting your negative self tell you how screwed up you are, how none of your dreams will ever come true, and how you will fail at everything you attempt, will help you to discern the “wise” you from the “negative” you.

When they’re done ranting, simply turn them over to your higher self to be healed. You’ll be amazed at how much lighter you feel after these sessions. But you’ll also want to…

4.  Get reality checks
Especially in the beginning, it can help to talk to people you trust about what you’re “getting” from your inner self. Sometimes the information can be surprising, and it’s great to have others to confirm or deny what you’re sensing.

But remember, this is a process. And you’ll want to be careful to

5. Trust it in little ways at first
If your “inner knowing” says to leave your marriage and join an ashram—don’t do it—unless you know you are listening accurately and it feels right to you. It will take time and practice to trust your inner guidance.

Ask your inner self how they suggest you spend a Saturday, for instance. But then, don’t blow off their advice. Do it. You won’t connect with that deep, wise place within unless you take this seriously. And then…

6. Remember what it feels like when you “get it”
You’ll feel it when you connect with the guidance system within you—either emotionally or physically, oftentimes both. It might be a tug in your belly. It might be be a chill down your spine. Or you might feel it emotionally—a peace or calm may come over you as you hit upon your inner truth.

When you do experience these telltale “signs” that you have connected to your truth, make note of it, so the next time you seek your truth you’ll know when you get it. And always…

7. Ask for help
You don’t have to do this alone. Your higher self, soul and other unseen friends want you to connect with your inner wisdom. Call upon them to help you out. They are always there for you, but you do have to ask for them to help. This is a free will universe and the rules are “hands off unless invited.”

Developing trust of your inner wisdom is one of the most valuable things you can do. When you have it, you’ll move through life with confidence, solidity, and peace—knowing that you are divinely guided all along the way.

Wishing you all the joy of connecting with your inner truth my friends!


PS.  How elegant, how easy, to simply “trust” that your intuitive knowing will lead you to exactly where you need to go.  But are you stuck where I was in the beginning—not able to believe in your own guidance system?  Our crystal kit for intuition can help you tap into your deep, wise place within and allow for greater connection with your inner knowing.

3 comments add a comment

3 comments to " 7 Tips to Tap into (and Trust) Your Inner Wisdom "

  • Blessed

    Hi Boni,

    I wanted to share another success that has brought me as much delight in the way it’s unfolded as I applied the guidance from this article as is it has in itself.

    I’ve been waiting on a work permit before I begin a new job, and it had been taking longer than I’d expected, and a part of me could not stop being anxious that it would never come and I wouldn’t be able to start my new job.

    So I started applying the tips in this article once I read it last week. Every morning, I asked my inner knowing, “What do we get about this? Why is it taking so long?” And every day, my inner knowing pointed to a belief or habit I hadn’t been aware of: It was because I didn’t love myself. It was because I felt I had to earn my place here because no one wants me. It was because my child self felt so neglected.

    Finally, yesterday morning, I asked again, “What do we get about why it’s taking so long?” and my inner knowing answered, “Nothing. Trust that it’s coming.” (Mind you, there were two more days before the deadline for it to come would pass!)

    I was surprised, but I went on with my day, which turned out to be an unusual one and resulted in me falling asleep at 7:30 pm and waking up at 3:45 am.

    And when I did…what should I find as the first notification on my phone? The approval had come, and my new boss (who is currently in Europe) celebrating it with an email.

    I continue to be amazed by this process, and can’t wait to share more stories with you!

    With love,

    • Wow, Blessed, that is a beautiful creation! Congrats to you for acknowledging your anxious self and yet consciously connecting with your wise inner knowing (and listening!!).

      Yes, our universe is amazing. And our power is unlimited. Keep up the great creating!!


      • Blessed

        Hi Boni!

        I have a question for you — Is there a certain power in being in nature? Through all the wonderful creation techniques I’ve learned from here I got a job and a permit to do it that let me move to a city I love (some of the stories about which I’ve been sharing with you!)

        However, ever since I did move a week ago and start working, I’ve found I feel a bit less powerful and ‘connected’ to my unseen friends and the universe. I chalked it up to not having as much free time to do techniques as I did before as well as just getting used to the change. I also made sure to ask my inner knowing what was going on, and I got a lot of helpful input: I believed that the external world was stronger than me. I needed to continue to love myself. I needed to slow down rather than speed up (this last one was surprising!)

        Today, however, the answer I got was that there is a certain power in nature, and before (when I was living in a more suburban/rural place) I was surrounded by it, and now I’m a little cut off from it in comparison. Is this right, or did I just mistake a random thought for my inner knowing?

        Thank you for your help and love as always!


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